Speed. Change. Time. LO10271

Dale Emery (72704.1550@CompuServe.COM)
30 Sep 96 16:37:46 EDT

Replying to LO10233 --


You wrote, "I don't know if I was knocked off balance, as I did come back
with several questions. The thing that disturbed me was not that they
didn't see instantly what I was trying to say, but rather that they
wouldn't inquire into my reasoning."

Okay. You would like others to inquire into your reasoning when they have
a difference.

You said, "Unfortunately the participants were the management team I work
with on a daily basis, which has changed the dynamics of our relationship.
I have a bit of a reputation as being a heretic, and to them my comments
were nothing more than profound validation of that fact."

Okay. It bothers you when others interpret your words in a way justifies
their existing negative views of you.

You wrote, "Later that evening I talked to one of the managers there and
privately expressed my frustration with the lack of inquiry. His comment
was, 'Ben, your constantly challenging traditional business wisdom; you
always want to examine assumptions, and point out blind spots; your so
esoteric and eccentric that nobody knows how to relate to you. Dumb it
down a bit, and things will work out.'"

Your reaction to the manager was, "In other words, stop thinking and act
like everyone else and things will be OK. . .they may have a point about
relatability and eccentricity, but that's where it stops. . ."

I wonder if you already held this view of the manager, and his words were
nothing more for you than a profound validation of that view. I also
wonder whether you inquired into his reasoning.



Dale H. Emery | 27 Tall Pine Road Consultant | Berwick, ME 03901 Relationship and Communication | (207) 698-1650 For Successful Organizations | 72704.1550@compuserve.com

Learning-org -- An Internet Dialog on Learning Organizations For info: <rkarash@karash.com> -or- <http://world.std.com/~lo/>