Re: Using Silence in Meetings LO2920
Fri, 22 Sep 95 20:58:33

Replying to LO2913 --

Rick sent this message:

>Well, I've experienced the exercise once and don't know much about
>leading it. Can anyone else Help??

On Thu, 21 Sep 1995 andrews@GDEsystems.COM wrote:

> I tried the stiff arm moving exercise you suggest, but could not get it to
> work. (I tried with 3 people.) Do you have suggestions about why I can't
> get it to work?
> Kate Andrews, Ph.D.

I was there when you learned it Rick, and have no prior experience with
it, although I have had some prior practice with similar exercises out of
other disciplines.

What probably cannot be conveyed in print is the sensitivity to the
implicate motion of the other person's arm. The way you laid it out was
correct: If you hold your arm out stiff in front of you, it will move -
even if only imperceptibly. To learn this exercise on one's own, it would
probably help to observe your own arm "in motion" in front of you, when
you hold it out perfectly stiff and straight. When you alight with your
fingers like a butterfly on somebody else's arm (at the wrist, or
thereabouts, to increase your leverage), the idea is to feel these motions
and then very gently "assist" with very light pressure when the hand is
moving in the direction YOU desire, then "backing off" as the other person
pushes back to "restore order". In this way you can set up an oscillation
whose arcs get increasingly wide, at which point you also add a *very
light* resistance to the swing back. Very gradually you are determining
the direction of movement, and the movement is very distinct.

This exercise has no explicit purpose. Principally, it demonstrates the
principle that you can have more impact on resistance through sensitive,
gentle nudges than with a powerful countercampaign. Practically, it gives
you tactile feedback related to this principle, which heightens your
sensitivity generally, and helps you engage with others physically as well
as intellectually. Surprisingly, this is as essential in the world of
business as it is anywhere else.

Jack Hirschfeld                                      Why do birds sing so gay?