Journal of a Sabbatical

March 1, 1999

an entry

This glob of ice has absolutely nothing to do with today's entry. I photographed it on that really cold day last week. I think there's a piece of rope inside it but it's so opaque I really couldn't tell.

I saw a bald eagle this morning on my way to the cafe where Bagel Shop used to be. It was flying roughly northeast from where I was and swooped fairly low over the cars on the road. I wasn't looking for eagles. I was looking for bagels and coffee. But there it was. In North Andover. One impossible thing before breakfast.

This afternoon I took a really long walk on the beach and then sat on a rock watching gulls eat crabs. Four gulls were fighting over one crab. They pecked at each other as much as they pecked at the poor crab. They puffed up their wings, shrieked to the heavens, grabbed pieces of crab from each others' beaks... no table manners whatsoever.

The beach deepened my already reflective mood. I sat there thinking I should be doing something specific to mark the tenth anniversary of one of the great epiphanies of my life: the day I realized I could never have another drink. So much has happened in the last ten years that I just sat there on the rock kind of watching a mental movie of it all in a combination of astonishment and gratitude.

OK. Enough of that, lest clichés start to pour out from the keyboard. Where was I before that, oh yeah, the gulls fighting over the crab. Other than the gulls, there weren't a whole lot of birds around. I didn't see any of the usual eiders or grebes in the usual places. The tide was way out - the lowest low tide I've seen in several weeks - so the birds were probably even further out.

My main mission in the greater Newburyport area was to drop off a new volunteer schedule at the cat shelter. I tried to pet Jaguar while I was there but he was curled up on top of Kappy's cage and Kappy kept hissing at me every time I reached up over him. Kappy's a cute orange tabby who is a little standoffish with people. I decided I'd better give up on trying to reach Jaguar so I wouldn't stress out Kappy. At least Jaguar knew I was there.

I felt like I got some things done today and the funk I've been in for the last few days seemed to lift a little bit for some chunks of time. Spring is definitely just around the corner.